reporting from the lesbian underground

we decided not to have all sixty people over for the housewarming soiree. you can see that our house is tiny and we would have been packed in like sardines with the 101 degree heat. my roommate hosted housewarming part I. i hosted housewarming part II last weekend. a.x. came for housewarming part I with her gay boyfriend. she was out of town when i threw mine. if you are a regular reader of this blog, you might remember when my gay boyfriend and i used to go to ladies' night together months ago. there was one night we were at the club this past winter and he clutched my arm and said, "oh my god, look at her. you two would be a perfect couple." a.x. was beautiful. i wanted to talk to her. "you should go talk to her," he whispered. "what should i say??" i asked him. my stomach shrank into a knot. what does one woman say to another woman in a gay bar? what if she was straight? conversation turned to determining whether or not the man she was with was her boyfriend or her gay boyfriend. "i think they're like us," i concluded, watching her body language. but i never found it in me to initiate contact. i did not see a.x. again until a drag show this spring and then at the pride festival. as fate would have it, my roommate works for the same company as her and we began talking. from then on we've been friendly. she was at the sin party with her friend, the one i danced with for most of the night, and i will admit that her friend eclipsed my interested in her at the time. but when the two of us were at ladies' night together several weeks ago, at the same club where my gay boyfriend had first given her the stamp of approval, i took her by the hand, led her down a deserted hallway that leads out to the alley, and out of the public eye we attacked each other against the brick wall. it was total passion. we made out hardcore for twenty minutes, coming up for air only when we were interrupted by a security man standing next to us. "ladies," he called out, hands on hips. "i'm going to need to ask you to vacate the hallway." he was looking at us like we were prostitutes performing tricks. a.x. and i did not tell anyone for awhile about our secret meetings. when she came to the housewarming party, we slipped behind the house, disappeared into the dark shadows near the creek and woods, and made out with carnal abandon. then we re-entered the house. the night she came over to spend the night, i was alone in the house. from here it becomes confusing and hazy. i remember her being in my bedroom. i remember her taking off my clothes. i remember her being totally into me. i remember being aware of how much i like her. i remember thinking afterwards that it could mean that we're going to be girlfriends. but after that night, she fell off the face of the earth. i never saw it coming. i don't know what happened in her mind that night. i don't know why she stopped calling. i'm left feeling used, disappointed, sad, confused. a.x. is a mystery.

photos = me and our house