jobs. jobs. jobs.

writing from epoch coffee after spending the night applying for jobs and getting caffeinated. my former boss gave me an excellent lead at a company that is hiring here. he personally knows the human resource people so maybe he can pull a few strings :) i thought it was coincidental that he got in touch right when i was feeling so hopeless and out of luck. i had that doomed feeling at x-mas dinner over bites of cake. i chain-smoked for hours with A. (i would like to say that i have decided to quit smoking *for good* on january 1, 2009). i've been smoking cigarettes off and on since i was twenty-one. although i've never been a daily smoker, i do not want to die from cancer at a young age and know that quitting will be the most ALIVE choice i could make right now. cigarettes, how i love thee, but you are lady killers. i will breathe smoke-free air. i will be greener. i remember the days of working for the depressing call center at the american cancer society, which drove me to smoke even more. listening to people dying from cancer for 8 hours a day made me want to light up right after work. i had to quit. the job.

2009 is going to be a better year.

here is a list of some of my positive visions:
1) my poetry book is on a shelf at book woman and book people
2) new job
3) move into a studio or garage apartment?
4) guitar lessons
5) yoga classes at the center
6) cook more
7) teach a writing workshop (in the works...)
8) write my novel
9) meet my next girlfriend
10) be more involved with the drag performance troop
11) let go of past friends and ex-girlfriends who no longer nurture who i am (letting go of people you love is hard but necessary)
12) continue studying buddhism
13) only seek out relationships with people who value me
14) fill my place with more plants and herbs
15) get a beta fish


phew...